Of Cross Roads

Photo credit - Web
written 06.06.2012 inspired by the movie "Another Perfect Stranger"

Often the word crossroads mean uncertain times, feeling lost, and having too many options at once. Almost always, cross roads symbolize a very meaningful if not life changing event in our lives. 

We may not know it, but every day we get to see The Cross in our roads. Preachy and quite something quoted from the Bible, but at the end of the day - after the hustle and bustle - you just remember something good even if you have had a bad day. That is the Cross - that is the voice that might sound like our thoughts and decisions but actually, it is the very same voice we fail to listen from God. That is the very same hope that allows you to take another crossroad each day. 

At those times when we feel uncertainty creeping on us, listening becomes easier to do, do you agree? We ask for advises, we consult our shrinks, and we find all possible ways to reassure ourselves 'we are right'. We listen intently in the hope of finding the reassurance we desperately need. But in the middle of it all, we fail to listen to ourselves and we ignore the silent clues sent by Him to lead us in the right path.

This is the part when we get lost. The excruciating point that we lose hope. And at this point, listening to The Voice is nearly next to impossible. We cower in our bad turns and decisions and find it hard to believe that you put yourself in a tight spot. We react differently and take actions variously. Most of us, when decisions take the wrong turn, turn bitter in finding The Cross in the road. Some take the down fall graciously, understanding that sacrifice is crucial to success in their undertakings. But what we fail to understand is that The Cross in our roads gives us the directions if we listen earnestly. That suffering and feeling lost and defeated is not what The Cross would want for us. The process is necessary to teach us to wait. That faithful waiting requires hope. I remember the movie line saying when there is delay in what must be done right, it is only allowed because of His mercy not to leave anyone behind in being right. 

And when we reach the point when we have earned patience in waiting, we find ourselves listening back to The Voice present in each one of us. Then, our hearts and mind slowly open to the possibilities ... and with them comes options that cause confusion. With too many options unlocked, which way does The Cross would want us to go?

There are three steps to remind yourself when you encounter a crossroad. 
Listen.
Wait.
And above all times, always hope. 
The Cross in your road will give you the certainty that you will be found with the right path in time.

She Should Have Been Named Lilith

Photo credit - Link (Web)
Lilith - The Forgotten First Wife of Adam
written by BEV on 09.28.2010

She always was a curious cat. She flipped comics even before she can read. She snatched books older than she was. She had a thirst for knowledge even for a little bits and pieces. She was the annoying kid from class who challenged her teacher just because their text book said something opposite to what their mentor was saying. 

It was no surprise she grew up always questioning things. It did not mean though that she was smarter than anyone else or that she is better than everyone. She just wanted to understand what most people find boring or irrelevant. There came a point even when her family did not understand what she is. And for a while, she lost herself knowing she disappoints her loved ones because she did not behave like she was told to. It was too sad a part of her is not accepted by people she expected that could. But she answered her own question one day and refused to doubt herself ever again.

Everyone else around her dubbed her unreasonable when she just wanted answers. She was called spiteful when she just wanted things discussed. She was a frank and outspoken girl who never stops with the reason just because. Not a rebel, but a wondering soul she is and a free spirit at that. Relief came from people who think like she is and not judge her for not being the emotional woman that most people assume any woman would be. Rationality is always her tool for figuring things out. This blocks her ability to feel emotions at their full blossom but it does not stop her from being kind or even being hurt.

She wanted things explained but respects mystery and uncertainty. Some find this hard, but to her she knows balance is the only way to go even with her thinking. She does not aim to always be on top of any game or win the prize, she just want to take a meaningful part in something. When she commits a mistake, she does not have second thoughts in saying "I was wrong" or "I am sorry" or even "It's my fault." For her, she was ordinary enough to be human and admit to be wrong or weak. But what sets her apart from most people is her refusal to make her humanity an excuse in committing mistakes. She believes she can learn always from everything she goes through in her life, no exceptions. 

But strange reactions is always prompted by people who do not understand her. Envy, jealousy, resentment, and even hatred. She does not understand that people can be so irrelevant sometimes to what she is just trying to do. This does not really help her in just being herself.

All she wants is to be herself. And to all the women trail blazing the paths less taken and finding ways to enjoy their own lives, KUDOS to you! Like the unpopular first wife of Adam, we are the epitome of independent thinking and still being loved anyhow. 

We are all, indeed, could have been from the woman named Lilith who took a chance to defy what is accepted to find her own joy and discover who she really was. So embrace yourself and never shy away from unconventionality. 

My Regular Miracle

written 4.46.2009, my room
photo taken by me St. Francis' Church, Maa, Davao City

Like a pill, an antidote

The One I cherish most

I ran away, far

He follows me and find my scars

With His words I tremble in fear

His touch bring me to tears

And then I feel with His will

I slowly lift my eyes and heal.

He points my puzzle to solve

Patiently, He creates the broken mold

Of my true self that age in pieces

He picks the parts and gently seizes

The love that can give the broken

And returns what has been stolen.

Everyday, He walks beside me

No matter the road I chose to be

He allows my freedom to roam

Never made me lost my way back home.